IS VIRGINITY THAT BIG?

When I was a child i was curious to knowing what others didnt. Nobody of my age cared what " dhall condom" sticken into the boards at some irregular spots of East West Highway meant. I wanted the answer. I asked it to one of my frankest guardian,,,,,my late grandmom. Such issues being a taboo in our society the answer what I received could not be fair. Still she tried her best and was able to satisfy me.

Now at this age I am curious for thing far more complicated than mere rubber. Still while most of the Nepalese linger about teaching other fellows how to wear condom.......i am now curious why is a thin membrane that covers the vagina of a women taken so seriously. Ya male virginity may still be under scrutiny but not as that as much of women.

I want to give you an example. After a well put on marital ceremony one of my relatives (a female) was returned maternal home....just for being accused of having sex with a men previous to marriage.  Now what  does it matter to that boy and his family...that with whom the girl slept with previous to marriage.

You may say ya it matters for a girl  to be a virgin so as to guarntee her of being married to a eligible boy.That same thinking has put the life of many widows colourless. So women forget about remarrying after divorce...and ya thats how we linger back.

What is wrong if we have consent in having pre marital sex.We must remain honest to our partner whether it be pre marital, marital  or post marital relationship. That is what we need not neccesarily a virgin couple being married into and virtually being pushed to have sex with unknown person.(I mean in arranged marriage thats the case)...So may be we open our eyes,,and may be Nepal Police stop raiding couples having sex other than that of lacking mutual consent, immature ages  and illegal prostitution

RUN HARD LADIES

Lately I have got into an irregular  habit of running down the crooked lanes leading up to the Pashupati Temple in the early morning. I had a sure feeling that the no. of males running alongside me would outnumber that of females and that too by a large margin.I was wrong.

I was astonished by the no of young girls and middle aged women coming in a gang, or with company of their husbands boyfriends,,,,,or brothers. That was different from what i saw when i joggled down the same route some ten year back in my blue adidas track suit trying to keep up with my fathers' pace.Maybe now at 20 I am more inclined to look at ladies for obvious reasons but I assure you something has changed.

Maybe the era of Korean slim actresses has taken over or many have carried out their lessons from baba Ramdev or have role modelled Mitchell Obama but I feel a change in mentality among most of the city dwelling women.Being educated almost with the same investment as their male counterparts and with the confidence that women too can do something more than just getting married off to a rich guy they have begun to take care of their physical fitness seriously.

Thats not only what i have noticed lately.Last 3 months I have begun to take it upon myself to walk on foot from New Baneshwor to Old Baneshwor every Friday and I feel the difference. Working ladies looking smart in their fitting ladies suit! Wonderful! Now that the change has begun to occur  lets hope matured women dont get them self quoted as just being a housewife.

DONT YOU SMELL SOMETHING WRONG?

I am one of those few students who have had the opportunity of
studying at  both Tri Chandra College (few months) and Kathmandu
University. The difference is striking . Many may point to the huge
difference in the fees that the two institute charge as a cause. That
may be a reason but the other major factor is the politics that
affects both the institution.
When you enter into Tri Chandra you cannot ignore the big boards of
political figures like Prachanda or Madan Bhandari welcoming you. That
surprised me. Are they so big a scientist to be there?  A step of few
leaders of the fellow student unions to please their senior comrades
has given the educational institution an ugly political look. Once you
enter into the college arena you can feel numerous unknown
people(obviously these are party affiliated student leaders)  shaking
hand with you and the funny thing is they may do  it even twice or
thrice to you in a single day. They don’t attend class regularly or in
most of the cases not at all (that’s why they have the time to discuss
politics and shake hands with every students).Silly thing is, student
politics is taken as a footstep to senior party politics. How about
the media? They constantly accuse politics in Colleges as a major
factor for degrading educational standards. On the contrary, when it
comes to student union election they portray it as a “mini election”
for the major parties to check their strength on ground.
Kathmandu University has clearly stated in its rules that no student
union affiliated to political parties shall be entertained. At least
that was among the points that I signed while I got admitted . There
are no such boards of political figures neither you can see offices of
such student wings. It clearly has a provision of a Student Welfare
Council, were members are elected among the class representatives
(i.e. one who have won from their respective class commonly known as
CR).This policy certainly discourages those sort of leaders who don’t
attend classes and later fight for the place in the student council.
The rules were broken though. I have two good examples to back it up.
When Girija Prasad Koirala, the then president of Nepali Congress,
died a notice was stuck on the notice board of the university gate
under the authority of Nepal Student Union –Kathmandu University wing.
Everybody saw it. The rules were broken. It seems as if the rules had
changed. Sadly, I didn’t know it or simply I don’t want  to come in
terms with it. Second one is related to the recent visit of Dr.Baburam
Bhattarai and the other fellow comrade(I forgot his name) of UCPN
Maoist. I too was interested in listening to him. A learned man and a
celebrated engineer himself  I hoped it to be fruitful. When I was to
enter the auditorium  it was clear the program was a political one
organized by the student union close to the Maoists popularly known as
“krantikaris”. I turned around and returned. How easy have we made for
the leaders to forget the rules? An individual is greater than a
University? Shame on us who attended!  If the rule is obsolete why
don’t simply throw it away rather than breaking it more than seldom.
Last Tuesday we had the student welfare council election. Two of my
friends stood up for the post of CR from my class. To my knowledge
they are merely interested or involved in active pro party politics.
At the time of election, the environment turns so ironic that they had
to have a backing from at least a political student wing. Getting
substantial post in the Student Welfare Council, is impossible until
you back a political wing or vice versa.
I felt sad and remained absent in the election. I can’t simply blame
my friends. Problem lies somewhere else. Slowly but surely we are
taking the wrong step by allowing such things to happen freely and go
unnoticed.  Now the former students who were the leaders of such
political student wings roam around the University during the election
trying to influence the voting pattern. After a decade we shall have
many more such “leaders” fighting for influence. Then we may have to
allocate a week for the election to the contrary of a single day in
the present day situation. The most troubling thing is I heard
teachers influencing students to vote to a certain political wing. One
of my friends reportedly received SMS from a fellow teacher to vote a
certain way. How fair is that? We all are hungry for power and
influence. The student unions create such atmosphere that we cannot
account for consensus in a class of 60.How can they suggest their
senior party leaders to form a government of consensus?.
It’s hard to create and sustain a university of caliber of as ours.
The result of politicization of the Student Council has shown its
obvious result. The University has been padlocked  since the election
.This is just one of the few problems that shall arise. In this path,
we shall surely reach a day where the VC, Registrar, Controller all
are from various political backing. Professors shall be hired in terms
of their political belongings and than we shall slide back once and
for all.
People may question me, how can the students be made politically aware
without making them involved in such pro party politics. They give me
example of various universities having pro party student election. The
problem I see is why do we always have to follow others. Why can’t we
lead by examples? If we want political awareness, why can’t we hold
political debates bringing politicians from world around. American
Universities holds debate between the candidates running for the post
of president. One of the Universities even invited the Iranian
President  Mahmoud Ahmadinejad to a debate. Why can’t we bring three
leaders of top parties and hold a heated debate regarding the
education policy they have neglected so easily? That way we shall be
politically aware and in fact ahead of other institutions which simply
hold a propaganda style one dimensional pro party conference with
senior party leaders. Maybe we come to realize that only few Nepalese
leaders have the quality to withstand such debates with a highly rated
academia.
We all are students and we all have the same agenda. We want quality
education .That’s it. We are being broken down into different fringes
due to the selfishness of political parties. Is there something called
pro communist physics or pro capitalist chemistry. No! So, why do we
have to be affiliated to one? We are surrendering our precious time
listening to the propaganda of our top leaders saying students should
now take the charge of the country. What they simply want us to be is
to be ready to block the roads when they don’t have the government .
Gosh , I recall Prachanda saying he wants to turn Universities to
Barracks. The students listened and clapped, and we revolt when we
feel questions are tough or when the exam centers are too tight. Such
are we into the shell of politics and power. We have forgotten what’s
right and what’s wrong.
Kathmandu University, I thought took a brave step and sought a new
system of remaining away from politics. Nobody cared of it when it was
small and in it early days. Now that it has grown and has turned
influential everyone wants a share of the pie. I have begun to smell
something wrong. We too are falling prey of dirty politics. We should
be aware of it right now .Small but irreversible changes shall hurt us
big in future. Otherwise, one day we shall be the same as Tri Chandra
were no entrance tests are taken, professors don’t come at time and
the student union elections stops the planned syllabus. Then the
experts shall flood in the op-ed with articles as much like they do
now commenting about the status of Tribhuvan University.It shall be
too late by then.

REFLECTION ON A CHANGING TOWN !

 Some precious making of my childhood took place at this  very town,  Lalbandi.If i know things such as tyre gada, a couple or two things more about the Haat bazar or rice harvesting all of the credit goes to this fellow town.I rode a buffalo here and i am learning to ride a motorbike here.The change is evident and can be felt in every aspect of lifestyle of people living here. The country has changed and as I say Lalbandi too have adjusted.....and more over has emerged as an important hub of the bordering( to India) Sarlahi District.

Lets begin with education. As I was a small kid, there were three boarding schools...and a primary and a secondary school in the whole neighbourhood. Now things have changed, the no of boarding( understand as private english medium school) has almost tripled.Higher Secondary and Bachelor Degrees has been introduced.Ya,,,,,,,these things make much of a difference but the other more important thing is the changed perception among the people.Unlike me, who carelessly squeezed  shirt into an unironed pant.....and locked the belt so ugly and then the knot of the tie which would sway in any possible arc about my neck my little brothe( my uncle's son) a nursery student cares for his uniform in every possible way.Smiling to myself I thought that was an individual phenomenon(as we say him nakkale),i peeped into the street leading to a popular boarding school early in the morning, and everyone were smart. Hair well oiled coupled with  handsome combing and a  neat handkerchief stitched with a saftey pin to the blue school sweater.WOW! what a scene.People have begun to take schooling as a wholistic approach of development of their child's personality.A significant change which is still lacking in various parts of the country.

Lets look at the second aspect employment.All Lalbandians combined still may not form a billionaire.Maybe not even half of it.But, almost all have managed to attach themselves to a satisfactory job(as per their qualification) apart from their regular agricultural practices.The amazing thing is, places like Lalbandi offers people and especially children to grow up in environment which will make them an allrounder of some sort.In an avergae family(lets assume a liitle more than average), children have an unique opportunity to learn how to milk a cow and simultaneously post the video of it on a facebook page.

Sub Urban place like Lalbandi are now the next frontier of Nepal which may play a dashing role in overcoming the widening rift between big cities and small villages.And also from a ethnic point of view Lalbandi provides a diverse yet peaceful blend of Mongols, Pahadeys and Madhesis.

Today, when i talk to people in Lalbandi, they are optimistic about their future.They seem to invest in their home town with ease and feel people in Kathmandu are a just an inch ahead in terms of infrastructure( education, banking, hospital etc.) but yards away in terms of quality of life(coziness,stress, pollution etc.).Amazingly enough people of this town have begun to take the later aspect as an important integral of a successful life.
Evidently, Lalbandi is expanding rate of immigration is higher than that of emmigration and hopefully turns into a happyily self sustaining municipality in the near future!

TRAVELING WITH A CHILD!

At school we used to study texts where the writer generally describes his journey with a small child.Recently I too had one.Nothing special happened except for the fact that i took an extra  notice of it.

I prefer to travel on Safa tempoes inside the valley.They are not the coziest or the fastest.The main advantage is that they limit the passenger seat to 10.I stood near Ghantagar.A tempo headed for Sinamangal arrived after a while or so.I gestured the tempo to stop.It did.I entered in.

I turned into a confuse guy, i saw no seat available and the driver had started to drive again.So, i thought i would stand on the back, and get a view of dusty Kathmandu( i have done that sometime and i truely feel awesome). Some seconds flew by pretty quickly. A fellow passenger pointed me to where this little girl sat, and said her mother to take her in her lap.(and later i found out the passenger was not a relative of the girl).I felt releived and waited for the little girl to be lifted and taken into her mothers lap. As it was happening , the girl said"tapai aatnu hunna yaha"{you wont fit in here!}.Just like what she said a very little space remained after she left her designated seat.Then I fitted myself to whatever of the seat was left.She responded at my face,"maile bhanakai thiye ni tapai aatnu hunna bhanera"{ i said to u , u wont fit in there}.

Well, she looked pretty and her fairy dress suited her too.To her poking comments I had nothing but a semi smile.

That made me remember my own childhood.Once in a bus, i began to argue with my mother that we were travelling West so we shall never reach home.I boasted my ability to predict directions, and i deliberately began to shout loud so that the conductor would listen to me. Instead the passengers smiled at me( the same semi smile as i have given to that girl).

One day this small girl shall grow up, and she too would give a semi smile to other childs.We all grow up and ......we all give the SEMI SMILE.Don't we!

Today, i again happened to travel via the popular "Annapurna tempo" to Ghantaghar.The tempo had vacant seats.A child and her mother boarded the tempo.By luck or by any other means this particular lady sat beside me.She left her daughter to squeeze(i mean comfortably) between big legs of her and mine.The ride was not a smooth one.The tempo would stop randomly and the passengers bumped sideways.So this little girl dressed in all white(coincindently as the other girl) grabbed my hand and later( just after a few seconds) put her hand into the hollow space formed between my elbow and and the abdomen.She felt innocent and didnt suffer any hazards.On the contrary, a teenage girl was bound to form a gap between mine and her .She had great difficulty controlling herself(i don't blame her for this misery).

Again, some another day i shall be in my 40's and she shall be in her 20's and whatever tough be the  ride she wouldn't even take a mildest of support on me. Things change bitterly with time and as i think childhood is the time when a human is a damn good innocent phenomenon.

NEW HOPES IN AN OLD CONTEST!

The current Miss Nepal can't boast herself a full support from her hometown while she will be competing for the Miss World title this October.
The beauty contest has always been under controversy from its very beginning.It is blamed as the contest treating women as a mere showpiece.But sometimes I wonder why the stereotypes don't protest the Male Body Building Contest where contestants.....dress up negligibly in comparison to their female counterparts of Miss Nepal.At least the formality of asking some questions is carried out in  a typical Miss Nepal contest (well i still think touching hair in a certain segment of the event is totally bizzaire).Enough has been debated on this matter and I shall take this issue in a new way in the following paragraphs.
Whatever be the case I am rather more optimistic via the individual who won the contest held on sep 1.Competing to represent the country(maybe also the Dabur Vatika as pointed out by some) takes enough courage.First of all at an age of 17 the contestant she has groomed herself and I myself being 20,don't remember myself thinking of competing in such a competitve event.
Also another interesting thing is ,the level of competition has increased for sure.In the previous contests, the final round used to give a obvious winner with many finalist giving pointless answers in a confused tone.But this time things changed for good, every finalist answered and more over the winner appeared to be so confident that she spoke the same as she wrote in paper without even looking in it.
The answer of the winner was striking to me.She(from a science background coupled with a brief modelling career) slotted in one of her choices the dream of making her colleagues youth a scientist.That was unprecedented and especially the contest used to be full with the same mentally allied womens who made glamour their present and future. However this pretty lady..still continues to show interest in the field of science .
1st in her school, studying in the no.1 college of the country and tagged no.1 contestant...and going to win the contest she shows some unprecedented signs.So, maybe this time she changes the look of Nepali women in front of the foreigners...as did lately the U-19  women cricket team. So lets hope she brings the crown home and the event takes itself to a higher level rather than a mere annual debating point.
ALL THE BEST SADICHHA!!!!

HOW NON COMMITED RELATIONSHIP EXHAUSTS VALUABLE RESOURCES!!

Well last time when i took a bus from all famous Ratnapark to my university....i had nothin but the view ...that could be seen through my window.I remember my friends rating ,,girls..while having nothing else to do.But let it be known,I am bit more respectful..to those ladies...so  to get a good passtime I decided to count the no of couples.

It was an exotic summer evening(meaning some gentle breeze blew enough to keep it cool).and it was rather soon that i lost the count of my dear couples.

So the trend is increasing to be indulged in a relationship(that certainly.is ..less likely to be converted in to marriage or any sort of creative coperation at least)...among the urban campus goers of Kathmandu...Same is in my university...or let say..the tendency is always there among the teens.

One of brother too haves a such...KIddyfiddy(grade x) relation.Last week when he was invited to a football tourney by his friends.He skipped it and rather went to Gopi Krishna(a cinema Hall) to...watch movie with his young unaware and equally mis adventurous....girlfriend.I shall put all my money,,,if somebody comes to bet with me...whether they shall remain together till they go to a college.So what i am trying to prove here is my uniquely talented brother is not exposing himself to a game of cricket or spending the resources he used to buy the tickets...to buy a small handscope for himself to carry out a mini research.

Worse is the phenomenon among college goers.The tendency to show off and to portray oneself as the capable one to get the best male/female (hereby i mean the most attravtive) has lead to complete...distraction among the youths from their serious agendas.

So why dont we begin to realize the loss of our resources and rather be indulged in a good thoughtful and creative relation that brings the best out of both the partners.A relation just for a sake of it....which is sure to end invites nothing but waste of time and resources.